Whether you’re trying to reconcile with an ex partner, or attracting a new relationship into your life, you’re probably in a mindset of “chasing”.
In this article, I am going to discuss a few questions that you should ask yourself to find out if you are part of the “chasing” group, why it is not the best state to be in and how to stop chasing love and start manifesting love.
Are you chasing love?
Most of us spend a lot of time chasing something that we want to achieve to be happy, either it’s money, a specific career, a house, a specific person or relationship.
We spend hours thinking about what we want and we end up taking actions that we eventually regret along the process. We become so focused on what we want to attract that we completely forget about everything else around us, as if nothing else could ever make us happy. As an example, we can become so focused on trying to get an ex back, because we think they are a soulmate or a twin flame, and we end up ignoring all the amazing people we meet along the way. Our mind associate happiness with a specific outcome and if we don’t achieve the desired goal, we feel miserable and start creating beliefs of not being worthy of love. Sometimes we can even fall into the trap of “victim mentality”. We think that we are a victim of the universe and that all our relationships end up the same way, with us being hurt.
What happens when you chase love?
Does the above scenario look familiar? If so, you might be chasing love. You know the thing is, when you’re chasing love, you are saying to the universe “I don’t have love”, you are in a state of lack. If you’ve been following my blog, you probably know by now that your thoughts are energy at specific vibration according to the Law of Vibration. Also, your thoughts attract into your life events, things and people that resonate at the same vibrational frequency according to the Law of Attraction. This means that if you are in a state of lack, the universe will send you people and relationships that resonate at the same low frequency. That’s why you might sometimes feel that you’re living the same story over and over again. The good news is that it doesn’t have to be this way forever, all you have to do is to change your vibration. If you raise your vibration from a low frequency of lack to a high frequency of love, manifestation will come naturally into your life. Check out the Hawkins scale of vibration to learn more about the different frequencies.
Don’t chase, attract!
How to stop chasing love and start attracting love
As I just mentioned, if you want to learn how to stop chasing someone, you need to make sure that you start by raising your vibration. I have many articles on how you can do it.
I also have a few more tips for you that will completely change your life and help you attract the person and relationship that you deserve. Let’s look at the best ways to stop chasing people and love:
Practice self love
This is the key to attracting love to your life. Let go of any negative self talk or limiting beliefs such as:
I am not worthy of love.
I am not enough.
No one will ever truly love me.
All my relationships end up the same way.
Instead, realise all the good things about you. Realise that you have yourself and you are enough. You don’t need to try to find happiness in someone else, happiness is within you.
Realise you have so many reasons to like yourself and for people to like you and to want to be with you. You are whole and complete. As soon as you feel happy with yourself and enjoy being alone, that’s when magic happens ?
You are valuable and deserve reciprocity in a relationship. Don’t settle for less than what you deserve. Avoid one sided relationships and stop chasing people!
Don’t put someone on a pedestal. Don’t act as if the person you are chasing is “the one”. You are the one! And you deserve someone who love you for who you are. You deserve better!
Relationships are a great mirror to show you what you are made of. Learn more about yourself and become your greatest version.
Start doing more of what you love, either it’s a job or hobby. If you are doing what you love, you are in alignment with your higher self. When you are aligned, things start coming to you easily. Manifestation becomes natural and everything you truly need will come to you. Doing what you love is practicing self love.
In order to practice self love, also take care of yourself physically and mentally. A good tip is to try meditation, crystals to attract love and positive affirmations to attract love.
Allow yourself to grieve
If you’re broken hearted because of an ex, don’t start chasing the next relationship in order to ease your pain. Acknowledge the pain and allow yourself to grieve first. I can’t stress enough how important this step is. Most people try to numb themselves and end up caught up in very toxic and destructive behaviours. You need time to grieve. Don’t be afraid to let yourself cry. Crying has many health benefits and I would even say that you should cry more often. There’s no shame in loving someone and missing them. Allow yourself the time to live with and understand the pain. Skipping this step will only lead to more heartache.
Don’t blame yourself
Don’t blame yourself for the situation you are in. Everything happens for a reason. If someone hurt you, forgive the person who hurt you and forgive yourself. Focus on the lessons you learned instead of what they have done.
Don’t hold on to heavy negative energy. Get over past hurt even if you think they don’t deserve forgiveness. Let the universe deal with them. Whatever they have done, it’s their problem, it’s their karma. You are not responsible for their actions. You are only responsible for how you react to it, to how you respond to the situation. Don’t even wait for an apology. Don’t waste your time and life, you have stuff to do, a life purpose and mission.
Keep in mind that you can’t make people change unless they are ready to change. Everyone is on a different journey, their own consciousness evolution journey.
Don’t hold grudges, it’s for your own peace of mind so that you can move forward. Grudges are bad for your health. It makes you become heavier. To move on you need to be light and without attachment to any heavy baggage.
If it didn’t work out with them, wish them well.
You will meet someone who will respect you and treat you as you deserve to be treated.
Then let them go.
If someone doesn’t want to be in your life, let them go
Letting go of any desired outcome is essential when you trying to achieve it. I know it sounds contradictory but that’s just how the Law of Attraction works. If you want to manifest a specific person, you need to be able to live happily without them. The more you chase something or someone, the more you will repel them because you are in an energy of lack. You need to move to an energy of abundance. So how do you let go?
Well, start by accepting that whoever is meant to be with you, will always come back to you. Focus on yourself. Feel abundant and happy by yourself.
Let go of the chase to make space for what you truly deserve.
Take the lessons
If something that you were chasing, doesn’t come back to you, it means that it was not supposed to be in your life. It means that it had other purposes in your life. They crossed your path to help you grow and teach you some lessons. Reflect on those lessons, be grateful and move on.
Be ready to receive love
It might sound weird but many people don’t know how to receive love. This is because they keep themselves at a low vibration which creates resistance and prevents love from manifesting.
Make sure you are in a receptive mode by not allowing specific people to take too much space in your mind. You need to make space for all the good things that await you. Realise something good will come to you, something better.
In the meantime, surround yourself with people who inspire you, support you and have your best interest.
What it’s meant to be in your life, it will find its way to you.
Life is full of possibilities. Every day is a new start.
Stop chasing love and relationships, focus on yourself, practice self love and they will naturally come to you.
Love and Light x