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The Dark Night of the Soul

July 26, 202112 minute read

Ever feel lonely, lost, depressed and without purpose? Do you feel confused about your sense of self and identity? Do you feel like your life has suddenly fallen apart and you lost some of the things you considered being the most important in your life? Have you been asking questions such as:

 “Am I going crazy?”

 “What is happening to me?”

“Why does reality look so different than it used to?” 

“What am I supposed to do now?”

At first, these types of questions are usually linked to clinical depression, however, for many people this means that they are going through one of the most difficult spiritual awakening stages typically known as the “dark night of the soul.” This process is often seen as the negative or recessive phase of the spiritual evolution process, usually carrying with it low frequency emotions and great dissolution. However, it is an essential part of the journey, which will change your life forever and for the better.

Not everyone goes through this process in their journey of conscious evolution. Many people go through easier spiritual awakenings where they simply “wake up” spontaneously one day without the need for painful triggers such as traumatic events in their lives. But if you were guided to this article, and resonated with what we have described above, then you might be going through this stage, so keep reading to find out what the dark night of the soul is and how you can get out of it feeling completely transformed and stronger than ever.


What is the dark night of the soul spiritually? What does it mean to go through the dark night of the soul?

 The dark night of the soul is also known as the “dark night of the ego” or “dissolution of the ego” and can be seen as a transformation and evolution of one’s personality. 

As the physical reality is composed of potentially infinite, it expands through a shedding or dissolving of form and rebirth. The “dark night of the soul” is the process of effective death and rebirth of the ego, and by extension the physical identity. 

“The dark night of the soul” often creates lost and depressed feelings, as there appears to be little meaning in life or experience during this period. This is almost a subconscious recollection of spiritual truths, which interact with the personality and invalidate all of the belief systems which seemingly justify your physical existence. 

This is designed by the higher-self so that the mind and body may direct itself towards a more spiritual oriented path. Though the personality feels itself to be miserable, as it is in a way slowly “dying” so that the personality may be reborn. 

Many people who go through a dark night of the soul report drastic changes in their personalities which makes them feel as if they don’t recognize themselves anymore. Let’s look at some signs that you might be going through a dark night of the soul.


Dark night of the soul signs

  • Unexpected and drastic events have occurred in your life.
  • You feel lost, confused and heartbroken.
  • The pain seems unbearable and overwhelming.
  • You don’t understand why you are in such pain as usually you would consider yourself a strong person and you would recover quicker from unexpected upheavals. 
  • You suddenly realise that you hate the job you had for decades and you have no idea why you have done it for so long. 
  • You realise that the type of relationships you had in your life were completely meaningless and not what you actually want for yourself. 
  • You don’t understand how and why you had a particular lifestyle for so long and you might even start blaming yourself.
  • You feel a strong need of becoming vegetarian or vegan or change your health habits completely as your body suddenly stops tolerating certain foods or you feel an unexplainable pull to try foods you never even considered before.
  • Activities and hobbies that were once a staple in your life, don’t look attractive anymore.
  • Your friends look somehow strange or unfamiliar to you. You don’t understand why you feel so distant from them.
  • You are overwhelmed by sudden events and synchronicities that put you on the spiritual path, such as certain spiritual books or videos “magically” showing up in your life and the strong pull to read them or listen to ideas that you have never been open to.
  • The world and reality around you feels like a “stage” where nothing looks real.
  • You start questioning everything that you always believed in or took for granted.
  • An unexplainable feeling of compassion for all beings and the realisation that everything is connected and we are all one with the universe.

No wonder this is such a difficult and unfamiliar process which leads to deep dark emotions and feelings of confusion. It can literally feel as if you are “dying”, and in a certain way, you are! Your whole identity and ego are dying and this can be quite frightening. 


What is the purpose of the Dark Night of the Soul?

The purpose of the dark night of the soul is to which give way for someone to ascend into a state less associated with the limited third-dimensional self and more aligned with the higher immortal being – a kind of initiation process. In Egyptian Hermetic and hieroglyphic texts it is said that often the temples and pyramids were used as ritual grounds for initiation, a widely practiced process where a person is intentionally exposed to a so-called “dark night of the soul” in order to make their personalities more magically capable. 

The logical mind observes reality through a constant obsession with problem solving and making sense of the seemingly infinite sources of stimulation in the environment. This is a processor which filters and interprets experience so that the spirit may be given the opportunity to form biases and impressions which may be used in the soul evolution. 

The personality serves as the expression of the self identity on the physical level and is more or less a composite series of these biases. The dissolving or balancing of these biases function as nourishment for the soul and is basically an undistorting of the whole purity which is the true self. 

Magic, which is defined as “making changes in consciousness” according to the initiate W.E Butler, is detrimental to a personality full of limited biases and beliefs. To expose a mind with a limited perception to the infinite possibilities and realities which come with “truth” would threaten sanity of the mind. I am sure we can all think of someone very immersed in their limited belief systems who may be extremely adversely affected by being exposed to great spiritual wisdom!

“Initiation” is the careful process of stripping away these limiting beliefs and creating a new personality which identifies less with the physical self but more with the immortal self. This allows the self to be able to safely be exposed to more spiritual truths and by extension become powerful creators. 

This process usually happens to starseeds or lightworkers who have a mission which requires them to hold a higher frequency. Most starseeds have the primary directive of raising the vibration of the planet during this ascension process, so are required to be more ‘heart centered’. This expanded personality is the foundation upon which a starseed or lightworker builds their pursuit of the spiritual path and service. 

It is extremely difficult with the various biases and limited belief systems which are inherited during the incarnation process.  Therefore, the process of going through the dark night of the soul has the purpose to help them awake quicker so that they can start fulfilling their mission on Earth.


What triggers the dark night of the soul?

The main triggers of a dark night of the soul are sudden and unexpected events or experiences in one’s life, often perceived as deeply “negative”. These can be:

  • Accidents such as car accidents
  • Health threatening disease diagnosis
  • Near death experiences
  • Loss of a job
  • Loss of a friend or family member
  • Divorce or dissolution of a romantic relationship (very common in twin flame relationships)

There are cases where people experience more than one of the situations listed above, at the same time, which shows how painful and dramatic the dark night of the soul can be. 

It is essential to keep in mind that these triggers are designed by the higher self to help us awake quicker to our true self so that we can start fulfilling our mission.


How long does the dark night of the soul last? Does the dark night of the soul ever end?

This process does end, however will take as long as is required to achieve the minimum level of distortion in your personality necessary for your particular mission or purpose on this planet.

For most people this is to the aim of operating in your heart center and holding a fifth dimensional perception. The length of time this requires depends on the energetic imbalances within your field. These imbalances may be learned in the upbringing, life experience, or even previous lives. The more acute imbalances may be defined as trauma, and the “dark night of the soul” often includes the confrontation of these energetic traumas. 


How do I survive the dark night of the soul? How do I get out of the dark night of the soul?

This process should be approached with patience and acceptance, much like any natural process of physical growth. It will create an awareness that is often extremely uncomfortable, as it allows the perception to see the self and the environment with clarity. 

The imbalances in the world may seem overwhelming and you may feel uncomfortable to the point of unbearableness. There is no way to forcibly stop this process, until the required expansion is met but there are things you can do to help you navigate these turbulent waters and get out of the dark night of the soul quicker. Here are some tips:


  • Learn how to surrender. There is a powerful book by Michael Singer “The surrender experiment” which can help you understand the importance of surrendering to the process rather than trying to fight it and wanting life to be just as it used to be. This will lead to the necessary evolution and will help you heal quicker.


  • Develop the practice of meditating. This will allow you to learn how to be more present in the moment instead of dwelling in the past or feeling anxious about the future. Remember that the present is all that is, everything else is just an illusion.


  • Be kind to yourself. Remember that everything is happening for your highest good and you will soon take your power back and feel completely transformed.  Avoid blaming yourself for everything that is happening and instead see it in a different perspective more as an observer. 


  • Try mantras and affirmations to help you stay calm. For instance, you can develop the habit of repeating to yourself “everything is ok”, “I surrender to the process”, “I release everything that no longer serves me”,  “I am willing to allow my soul to guide me for my highest good”.


  • Ask for help from a spiritual teacher if you feel the need for it. One of my favourites is Christina Lopes. She also has an amazing YouTube channel with very powerful and useful free resources that you can use to help you during this difficult time, and where you can connect to others who are going through the same process as you.


What happens after the dark night of the soul?

Once the expansion and balancing process is complete, spiritual seekers usually find their perspective to be greatly expanded. They will also find themselves able to hold a higher frequency, capable of greater feats of understanding and compassion. 

They will be less limited by the physical identity and able to influence reality and create on a more energetic level. Often people will also find out a new “spiritual gift” or develop an ability that they never thought they would have, such as clairvoyance or clairsentience.  

Many people will then move to different stages of their spiritual awakening which can include “the Void”. This is another very common stage where after a huge period of transformation, it feels like your life is put “on pause” for a while so that you can rest and recover from everything that has happened.

In the end, life will never be the same after the dark night of the soul. You were born again and infinite possibilities will be available to you as you heal and recover. You will feel more powerful than ever and a soul “on a mission”.


Every spiritual seeker and starseed in on a pathway of service to their fellow man and the planet. Often in order to be of service, be it in the form of a healer, teacher or a source of love and light the mind and body must be remoulded into a form not taught by our institutional systems of education. The “dark night of the soul” is in a sense a system where the soul educates itself. 

Though painful and difficult, it is only through confronting and working through the low vibrational experiences which characterise much of Earth, may we move beyond them. Energy may not be created or destroyed, only transmuted. 

So stay strong, it is time to take your power back. Your life is just beginning.

Take care!

Love and light x

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